टंक न्यौपाने Tank Neupane: 6/7/09

Newswriting for Radio
Welcome to newscript.com, the Newswriting for Radio website. The Newswriting for Radio website is an online tutorial on the craft of radio journalism, with particular attention to the writing of news scripts. Since 1996, newscript.com has been providing creative suggestions and ideas to radio news reporters, writers and anchors, as well as to broadcast journalism students around the world.
Improving your newscasts
The purpose of this website is to help radio journalists improve their skills as writers and anchors. Journalism education has greatly declined over the past two decades as colleges and universities have either closed journalism programs or transformed them into "Communications Departments." Radio journalism has been especially hard hit, with diminished teaching resources given over to television instruction because TV is the more attractive broadcast medium.
Consequently, many journalists starting out in radio lack basic knowledge on how to communicate effectively though the medium. In the past, much of that knowledge was learned on the job, but consolidations, cutbacks and downsizing in radio have reduced news staffs to the point where news directors can afford little time to training those new in the profession.
In this sink-or-swim environment, far too many radio journalists have figured out only how to float. They haven't been introduced to the wide range of possibilities in preparing radio news and are often frustrated either by not being able to move up to a larger market or by not having the satisfaction of becoming respected journalists within their communities.
Features
This website is intended for those who are early in their radio careers, whether in a first or second job or still in college or an internship. The pages assume some experience in radio, but visitors unfamiliar with some of the terminology may consult a small glossary. Although the Newswriting for Radio website has been extensively used in college journalism courses, the website is not meant to replace a broadcast newswriting textbook. The Newswriting for Radio website is a supplement to coursework, and especially to on-the-job experience.
The site is organized into four major sections. In The Basics, you learn fundamental lessons and characteristics of broadcast newswriting. Three different newscast formats are examined in The Styles. You'll examine some of the questions surrounding what deserves coverage in the section on News Judgment. Finally, The Newsroom teaches you about creating an organized environment that allows you to be better prepared for stories. There's also a collection of links to other radio journalism websites.
On several of the pages, sample news scripts are accompanied on the right side of the page by the speaker symbol (shown on the right side of this paragraph). The appearance of the symbol next to a script indicates that you can listen to a sound file (in the WAV format) containing the words of the script. Listening to these files will allow you to hear and practice the patterns of voice modulation regularly used in radio newscasts. Just click on the symbol to hear the script.
Basic ideas on radio writing
These pages provide an introduction to radio newswriting. The topics cover sentence structure, how to begin stories, the proper use of numbers in scripts, how to rewrite newspaper stories and press releases, and how to prepare broadcast scripts based on information from law enforcement officials.
1. Avoiding "Cop Talk"
Many of the stories we report involve crimes and police attempts to apprehend those responsible. The importance of these stories to our listeners, as well as the often complex and uncertain nature of police investigations, can be quite intimidating for young reporters, with the result that they frequently repeat verbatim the description of a crime given to them by a police official.
Don't "do the police in different voices"
Police officers are taught to describe their investigations in a way that provides specific details of events with the vaguest possible discussions about those whom police believe responsible. This "cop talk" developed from the legal requirements that enforcement officials need to meet in order to make arrests and gain convictions. But "cop talk" is inadequate for reporting on radio.
Here's an example of "cop talk," a story only slightly modified from what was broadcast on a small-market station:
TWO MEN ARE UNDER ARREST FOR ROBBING A JEWELRY STORE. POLICE SAY THE MEN ENTERED THE VILLAGE PAWN SHOP AT 1407 MAIN STREET AT APPROXIMATELY 10:15 YESTERDAY MORNING. AFTER WAITING INSIDE THE STORE FOR A FEW MINUTES, ONE OF THE MEN DISPLAYED A GUN AND ORDERED TWO EMPLOYEES TO PLACE INTO A DUFFEL BAG ALL THE CASH FROM THE REGISTER AS WELL AS SEVERAL ITEMS OF JEWELRY. THERE WAS NO ONE ELSE IN THE STORE AT THE TIME. THE MEN LEFT THE STORE, AND ONE EMPLOYEE WAS ABLE TO SEE THE MEN DRIVE OFF IN A BLUE DODGE ARIES. THE EMPLOYEES NOTIFIED POLICE, AND AT APPROXIMATELY 11 O'CLOCK A VEHICLE MATCHING THE DESCRIPTION OF THE GETAWAY CAR WAS SPOTTED PARKED IN AN ALLEY IN BACK OF A HOUSE AT 684 WILLOW STREET. POLICE ENTERED THE HOUSE WHERE THEY FOUND TWO MEN, AN AMOUNT OF MONEY, AND ITEMS OF JEWELRY LATER IDENTIFIED AS HAVING BEEN TAKEN FROM THE STORE. A COMPUTER CHECK OF THE VEHICLE DETERMINED THAT IT WAS STOLEN. THE MEN WERE IDENTIFIED AS 34-YEAR-OLD MILES STANDISH OF MIDDLEVILLE AND 28-YEAR-OLD JOHN ALDEN OF SMALLTOWN. THE MEN WILL FACE A VARIETY OF CHARGES.
Cut irrelevant details
This script (which runs about 54 seconds) is far too long, with irrelevant details such as the make and model of the getaway car, while the identification of the suspects isn't revealed until the very end. It is obvious that the reporter merely repeated the words of a police officer or of a police press release. Here's a brief rewrite of the script (which now runs 31 seconds):
TWO MEN ARE BEHIND BARS THIS MORNING AFTER AN ARMED ROBBERY OF A MIDDLEVILLE PAWN SHOP. POLICE SAY 34-YEAR-OLD MILES STANDISH OF MIDDLEVILLE AND 28-YEAR-OLD JOHN ALDEN OF SMALLTOWN ROBBED THE VILLAGE PAWN SHOP ON MAIN STREET YESTERDAY, FORCING TWO WORKERS AT GUNPOINT TO STUFF A DUFFEL BAG WITH MONEY AND JEWELRY. THE SUSPECTS WERE LATER ARRESTED IN A HOUSE ON WILLOW STREET AFTER POLICE SAY THEY SPOTTED THE GETAWAY CAR BEHIND THE HOME AND ITEMS TAKEN IN THE HEIST WERE FOUND INSIDE THE HOUSE. STANDISH AND ALDEN ARE EXPECTED TO FACE A VARIETY OF CHARGES.
The new version has the police making the allegations against the two suspects (as is legal and proper), but many details unnecessary to the main point of the story have been removed.
But don't make the opposite mistake of being too informal
"Cop talk" is predominantly a problem in small-market stations in stories by inexperienced reporters, but the opposite extreme seems to be taking hold in larger markets. Big-city reporters are becoming exceedingly colloquial in their language when covering police stories. Here's an example that aired on a major-market station in New England. The story concerned a stolen minivan in which a mother had left two babies inside. In telling the story the reporter said:
...A WOMAN LEFT TWO INFANTS IN THE VAN WHILE SHE DROPPED OFF AN OLDER CHILD AT DAYCARE. THE VAN WAS STILL RUNNING, AND MEANWHILE SOME GUY MUST HAVE JUMPED IN AND DROVE OFF. WHEN HE REALIZED THERE WERE TWO INFANTS IN BACK, HE DITCHED THE VAN, AND POLICE ARE NOW SEARCHING FOR THE GUY IN SOME NEARBY WOODS.... BUT THANKFULLY THE KIDS ARE OKAY.
This script does not clearly report what police believe to have happened. In fact, the script seems to indicate that this version of events is merely speculation on the part of the reporter. There was no indication of any witness seeing who drove the minivan away. Perhaps the driver was a woman. Moreover, there is no evidence for the alleged motivation of this mystery driver to have abandoned the minivan. Maybe the driver saw the babies, maybe the driver didn't.
Just as troubling as the sloppiness with which this script was put together was the overly conversational tone. A suspect of unknown sex should be called a "suspect." If an unidentified suspect is a man, he should be called a "man" -- not "some guy." Being too chatty damages the credibility of the reporter to be an authoritative source of information.
Radio reporters need to strike a balance in the language they use. Scripts cannot be ploddingly detailed and dull, yet being too colloquial may lead to sloppiness and lack of credibility.

2. Broadcast sentence structure
Journalism instructors often state that broadcast newswriting is supposed to sound just like everyday speech. In essence, however, writing broadcast news is more akin to writing song lyrics. Both tasks involve constructing language in a visual form (writing) for communication in an oral form (speaking or singing). Like song lyrics, broadcast newswriting adheres to patterns of language use (such as appropriate vocabulary and formulaic sentence-structure) that the audience expects to hear and will use in interpreting the communication.
Even though commercial broadcasting has been around for less than a century, radio listeners have come to expect their newscasts to be written in a particular way. Learning about broadcast sentence-structure is one of the foundations for developing effective skills at radio newswriting.
Keep it simple
Grammarians distinguish between three types of sentences: simple, compound and complex. A simple sentence contains a subject and a verb. A compound sentence is composed of two simple sentences joined by a coordinating conjunction ("and," "but," "or," "nor"). A complex sentence is composed of two simple sentences joined by a subordinating conjunction (which may be temporal, such as "when"; causal, such as "because"; or concessive, such as "although").
You probably remember this lesson from elementary school, but the distinctions remain quite relevant to broadcast newswriting. In your scripts, simple sentences are best. You will, of course, regularly use compound and complex sentences, but the clarity achieved through the use of simple sentences can rarely be surpassed.
Linguists describe English as a highly asyndetic language -- which means that clauses in the same train of thought do not always need to be connected by conjunctions or connecting particles. Such particles in English include the words "moreover," "furthermore," and "however," words that should be avoided in broadcast newswriting. Listeners are themselves capable of connecting the elements of a story if the story is presented clearly and concisely, and these listeners expect important news to be reported in simple sentences. This expectation is especially true of leads, which generally should be written as simple sentences. When a lead begins with a subordinating conjunction, listeners discount the story's urgency. This is why such leads almost always appear in feature stories or zingers.
Avoid your relatives
Relative clauses, which begin with a relative pronoun or adverb such as "who," "which" or "where," provide additional information about a noun in a sentence. Those relative clauses which interrupt the flow of the sentence should not be used in broadcast newswriting. In a text communicated visually, a reader has the words on a page or screen to help guide him back to the story after the detour of a relative clause. Listeners do not have such a guide and must rely on the speaker to provide information in readily understood clauses that are concise and uninterrupted.
A sentence with an interrupting relative clause should be rewritten into two simple sentences. Take the following example:
FRED GRANDY...WHO PLAYED "GOPHER" ON THE ORIGINAL "LOVEBOAT" T-V SERIES...LATER SPENT 8 YEARS AS A CONGRESSMAN FROM IOWA.
A clearer means of expressing the same information is through two simple sentences:
FRED GRANDY PLAYED "GOPHER" ON THE ORIGINAL "LOVE BOAT" T-V SERIES. HE LATER SPENT 8 YEARS AS A CONGRESSMAN FROM IOWA.
Recognize that apposition -- the placing of a noun or phrase after another noun and marked off only by commas or, in this very example, dashes -- is like a relative clause without the relative pronoun. Long, interrupting appositions, like interrupting relative clauses, should be avoided in broadcast newswriting.
Relative clauses and appositions can be used at the end of a sentence. This placement is especially useful for clauses beginning with the adverb "where," as in
FIRE DESTROYED THE HISTORIC HOME, WHERE GEORGE WASHINGTON ONCE SLEPT.
Clauses beginning with "who" or "which" are acceptable when placed at the end of a sentence, but sometimes it may be preferable to write two simple sentences instead. For example,
SIMMONS IS SUING FOR RETURN OF THE "BARBIE"-DOLL COLLECTION, WHICH HE SAYS IS WORTH A QUARTER-OF-A-MILLION DOLLARS.
could also be written
SIMMONS IS SUING FOR RETURN OF THE "BARBIE"-DOLL COLLECTION. HE SAYS THE COLLECTION'S WORTH A QUARTER-OF-A-MILLION DOLLARS.
Be active
Finally, two very common writing faults made by beginning reporters also appear nowadays in all other types of English writing, namely the overuse both of the passive voice and of the existential "there is," "there are" construction. Use the active voice. Write sentences with subjects that are doing things and not subjects that are merely receiving actions upon them. Do not waste time stating an object's existence (this is what the "there is" construction shows). Describe that object doing something.
Simple sentences with active verbs form the basis of effective writing for radio. All other broadcast newswriting techniques are built upon the foundation laid by this type of sentence structure.

3. charge and allegation
During the initial flurry of stories concerning President Clinton's relationship with former White House intern Monica Lewinsky, the late ABC-TV news anchor Peter Jennings interviewed humorist and social commentator P. J. O'Rourke. Jennings asked O'Rourke to discuss "the alleged age difference between the President and Ms. Lewinsky," to which O'Rourke wittily replied, "Yes, Peter, we haven't yet determined whether there actually is an age difference between President Clinton and Monica Lewinsky. There is only an alleged age difference."
Jennings smiled at the reply, realizing that he had misused the word "alleged." The word allows journalists to discuss claims that have not been proved, but it is a word easily open to abuse.
Say, say, say
The best way to use the words "allege," "alleged" and "allegedly" is not to use them at all. Instead, have your scripts reveal who is making the claim by using phrases such as "police say" or "prosecutors say" followed by the substance of the allegation. For example, a story about a bank-robbery suspect that contains the sentence
...34-YEAR-OLD MILLARD FILLMORE ALLEGEDLY ROBBED THE "BANK NOW" BRANCH ON CHURCH STREET....
should be rewritten so that the sentence reads
...POLICE SAY 34-YEAR-OLD MILLARD FILLMORE ROBBED THE "BANK NOW" BRANCH ON CHURCH STREET....
As another example, if a sentence in a story about a local government official facing trial for corruption reads
...ZONING BOARD PRESIDENT DOLLY MADISON IS ALLEGED TO HAVE TAKEN BRIBES FROM DEVELOPERS....
rewrite the script into something like
...PROSECUTORS SAY ZONING BOARD PRESIDENT DOLLY MADISON TOOK BRIBES FROM DEVELOPERS....
Always use the verb "say" in such scripts. Avoid the temptation to employ other verbs (such as "claim," "state" or "charge") when reporting allegations. Other verbs bring connotations that will color your reporting. For example, if your script has police claiming that an individual committed a crime, your listeners may well interpret the script as indicating that you the reporter do not believe the police. To speak of someone charging an allegation implies legal actions -- charges -- have been filed. To maintain as unbiased and accurate a report as possible, stay with the neutral verb "say."
J'accuse
Learn the distinction between "accused" and "alleged." When legal charges have been filed against an individual, that individual becomes accused of the behavior detailed in those charges. The individual can then be described as an "accused rapist," "accused murderer," "accused embezzler," and so forth. In scripts, the use of the adjective accused should be limited to one occurrence at or near the beginning of the script in order to describe a suspect quickly and efficiently. Notice the use of the word in this story about a homicide trial:
ACCUSED MURDERER AARON BURR HAS BROKEN DOWN IN TEARS AT HIS TRIAL, TELLING JURORS THAT HE DID NOT KILL HIS FRIEND ALEX HAMILTON LAST JULY. TAKING THE STAND IN HIS OWN DEFENSE, BURR CRIED YESTERDAY AS HE WAS TALKING ABOUT HIS INITIAL INTERROGATION BY SHERIFF'S DEPUTIES. BURR SAID INTIMIDATING QUESTIONING CAUSED HIM TO GIVE CONFLICTING STORIES TO INVESTIGATORS. PROSECUTORS HAVE SAID THAT BURR KILLED HAMILTON AFTER AN ARGUMENT OVER MONEY IN HAMILTON'S MOHICAN SPRINGS APARTMENT. BURR IS EXPECTED TO FACE CROSS-EXAMINATION WHEN THE TRIAL RESUMES AT THE HANOVER COUNTY COURTHOUSE LATER TODAY.
In the above script, the adjective "accused" appears once and only once. Multiple use may lead listeners to believe that you the reporter want them to think a suspect is guilty because the adjective "accused" is weaker than the powerful nouns it regularly accompanies (such as "murderer" or "rapist").
Charged up
As has already been mentioned, the verb "charge" implies that legal actions have been filed against an individual or company. The verb should be used only to describe the process of filing the action:
POLICE HAVE CHARGED 32-YEAR-OLD LIZZIE BORDEN WITH TWO COUNTS OF FIRST-DEGREE MURDER FOR THE PICK-AXE SLAYINGS OF HER FATHER AND STEP-MOTHER....
The specific legal charge should also be named, such as the "two counts of first-degree murder" of the previous example. Pay careful attention to the specific charge. Prosecutors may say that an individual is a murderer and organized-crime boss but charge him with only tax evasion. The defendant could then be described as being "accused of tax evasion" but not as an "accused murderer and crime boss" -- the murders and organized-crime connections are allegations, not charges.
Proper allegations
Occasions do exist for the use of "allege," "alleged" or "allegedly." When claims are made concerning an individual but no legal charges have been publicly filed, and the source of the claims is complicated to identify, then "alleged" becomes an acceptable option for describing the individual and the claims. For example, a community group holds a press conference calling for the firing of the deputy chief of police. Earlier that week, three former civilian employees of the police department told a newspaper reporter that they have heard the deputy chief use racial slurs. The reporter was investigating a tip that the deputy chief had recently faced a closed-door, disciplinary hearing with the public safety director and the civil service commission.
The complex nature of the story can lead to extremely tortured syntax in your script. In this situation, a sentence such as
...THE "TOGETHER COALITION" IS ANGRY OVER RACIST COMMENTS ALLEGEDLY MADE BY DEPUTY CHIEF FRANKLIN PIERCE....
might be the most efficient way of succinctly explaining the story. As with "accused," forms of "alleged" should be used only once in a given script.
Finally, remember the mistake of Peter Jennings and ensure that you place the word "alleged" in front of what is actually being alleged. Rewriting the previous script example to read
...THE "TOGETHER COALITION" IS ANGRY OVER ALLEGEDLY RACIST COMMENTS MADE BY DEPUTY CHIEF FRANKLIN PIERCE....
significantly changes the meaning of the sentence. Now the question is not whether the deputy chief made comments, but rather whether the particular words he used were racist. If, however, it has not yet been determined what, if anything, the deputy chief may have said, the allegations concern the making of the comment and not the sense of the comments themselves. The earlier version of the sentence is then the correct one.
Finally, until a judicial authority has rendered a decision, a suspect or defendant has not been proved guilty of the charges or allegations against him. Not only is it unethical to describe this individual as, say, a "murderer" or "embezzler" without the qualification of words like "accused" and "alleged," but such descriptions could turn you into a defendant yourself -- for libel.

4. Leads and teases
Getting listeners to keep their radios tuned to your entire newscast...that's the function of leads and teases. (Incidentally, the first phrase of the previous sentence is itself a tease.) Despite the importance of leads and teases, many radio journalists do not understand how to fashion effective "hooks" to keep listeners listening.
Repetition is the most common mistake
Repetition is the most common mistake made in leads and teases. As you may have experienced when recognizing the identity of the first six words of the subhead with those at the beginning of this paragraph, repetition of words or ideas is tedious. Listeners understandably come to believe that there is far less news than meets the ear.
Yet repetition is a far-too-frequent feature of news writing, especially between the lead-in to tape (be it voicer, wrap or actuality) and the first sentence on that tape. Here's one such example:
EMBATTLED STATE LOTTERY DIRECTOR SAMANTHA WU HANDED IN HER RESIGNATION TO GOVERNOR FREDERICK DOUGLASS. REPORTER SUSAN STARR SAYS WU TOLD THE GOVERNOR THAT SHE HAD BECOME A POLITICAL DISTRACTION.
IQ: "IN HER RESIGNATION LETTER TO THE GOVERNOR, WU SAID THAT SHE HAD BECOME A DISTRACTION...
The second sentence of the lead provides information that is immediately given again by the first sentence of the tape. This is not, however, the only problem with this lead.
Keep it fresh
Tenses of the past should be avoided in leads and teases. The preterite, or simple past tense, must almost never be used. Any past action should be described in the perfect tense -- "have/has" + past participle, which often ends in "-ed." The stative quality of the perfect tense can make it seem like the present.
Better still is the use of the present progressive tense -- "am/are/is" + present participle ending in "-ing" -- to describe an event that has just taken place. In the story above, it would have been better to write:
EMBATTLED STATE LOTTERY DIRECTOR SAMANTHA WU IS CALLING IT QUITS. REPORTER SUSAN STARR SAYS WU FEARS THE CONTROVERSY SURROUNDING HER HUSBAND'S BUSINESS DEALINGS IS HARMING GOVERNOR DOUGLASS.
IQ: "IN HER RESIGNATION LETTER TO THE GOVERNOR, WU SAID THAT SHE HAD BECOME A DISTRACTION...
Present tenses give immediacy and energy to news writing, allowing listeners to feel that they are hearing about the news as it is taking place. Moreover, in the course of the day leads should be advanced to freshen the story...even though the same tape is being used. In the example story given above, a later lead for the same tape could be as follows:
GOVERNOR DOUGLASS MUST FIND A NEW LOTTERY DIRECTOR. REPORTER SUSAN STARR SAYS EMBATTLED CURRENT DIRECTOR SAMANTHA WU IS GIVING UP THE JOB.
IQ: "IN HER RESIGNATION LETTER TO THE GOVERNOR, WU SAID THAT SHE HAD BECOME A DISTRACTION...
The changing lead shifts the emphasis of the story to a future event, the appointment of a new lottery director. The tape then functions as background information for this future event, and so the package of lead and tape together remain fresh.
Absent antecedent alert!
A frequent error in teases is the use of pronouns without any reference to identify the pronouns. The pronouns' antecedents are absent. This error leads to teases such as:
HE WANTED TO DIE BUT THEY SAID NO. THE STORY NEXT ON 990 NEWS.
Who is "he"? Who are "they"? (The story concerns a convicted murderer who asked the jury to sentence him to death, but the jury decided instead on a sentence of life in prison without parole.)
Some might claim that this lead has mystery, and this mystery will compel listeners to stay tuned. There certainly is mystery, but confusion seems the only result in the minds of listeners. A better tease gives listeners information, not a guessing game:
LIFE WITHOUT PAROLE FOR CHILD-KILLER WALT THOMAS. THE DETAILS NEXT ON 990 NEWS.
Teases should not tell the entire story, but teases are only a sentence long. Even the most information-packed short sentence can rarely give all the necessary details to satisfy listeners. The tease whets the appetite of listeners, who will want the completeness of hearing the full script if they have an idea of what the story is about. Deliberately confusing or gimmicky teases only frustrate listeners and drive them away.

5. Rewriting the copy
Radio reporters spend as much time rewriting scripts as writing them. Stories are rewritten from three types of sources: newspapers, press releases and other radio news scripts. The first two of these sources are not written in broadcast style, and radio reporters need to be aware of the differences between print and broadcast.
Differences in style
One obvious difference involves numbers. In print style, numbers can be written out to exactitude, while on the radio numbers are reduced to two significant digits. Ages in the newspaper are written between commas after an individual's name; in broadcast style, ages are given as adjectival phrases preceding the name.
Newspaper stories also display a greater use of the past tense. Print is a distancing medium, separating events through the filter of the written word from the immediacy of their occurrence. Newspapers are also written hours before they are read, so the events described seem "old news." Radio, on the other hand, has an intimate, "you-are-there" quality that is enhanced by the use of the present tense. Newsmakers spoke to newspaper reporters ("Bush said...."); they speak to a radio audience ("BUSH SAYS....").
The art of condensing
The greatest difference involves story length and detail. Print reporters write hundreds, even thousands of words for a particular story. Few, if any, of your stories as a radio reporter should have even a hundred words. Rewriting newspaper stories becomes an art of condensing. Take the following example of a newspaper story from the imaginary Middleville Times:
The crumbling Salt Creek bridge on Old Route 9, considered one of Middle County's most historically significant bridges, will receive a $200,000 grant for repairs from the state Department of Transportation, according to county engineer Squire Whipple.
The funding comes from the state's Transportation Enhancement Fund, Whipple said.
Built of sandstone in 1834, the bridge is a 285-foot span made up of three arches over Salt Creek on the old route from Middleville to Greenfield. Deterioration of the bridge in recent years has been a worry to local preservationists. The bridge was closed to traffic in 2005.
The $200,000 infusion will cover the estimated cost to stabilize the bridge until money can be found to restore it. Permanent repairs could cost as much as $1,750,000, Whipple said.
The example above is quite short by print standards, but it's far too long for radio. Remember, a radio story without an actuality (a "reader") should generally run about 20 seconds. Get to the heart of your story and leave the additional details out, as in the following 21-second rewrite:
A CRUMBLING HISTORIC BRIDGE IS GETTING SOME LONG-NEEDED REPAIRS TO KEEP IT FROM COLLAPSING INTO SALT CREEK. THE MIDDLEVILLE TIMES REPORTS THE STATE WILL PROVIDE TWO HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS TO PRESERVE THE OLD-ROUTE 9 BRIDGE BETWEEN MIDDLEVILLE AND GREENFIELD UNTIL MORE MONEY CAN BE FOUND FOR PERMANENT REPAIRS. THE 170-YEAR-OLD STONE BRIDGE HAS BEEN CLOSED FOR THREE YEARS.
Unless you have spoken to individuals involved in the story yourself, you must attribute your rewritten story to its newspaper source. The attribution generally begins the second sentence of the script ("THE MIDDLEVILLE TIMES REPORTS...."). Not only is it ethical to credit the news organization that discovered the story, but if the newspaper gets it wrong (a not infrequent occurrence), the error and any of its consequences will generally not fall on you or your station.
Please release me
Most of the press releases a newsroom receives concern community groups trying to gain publicity for themselves or their events. Usually these press releases are of minor news value. In smaller communities, however, listeners expect to be informed of such events, and program directors may well inform the newsroom that a story must be aired. Generally, though, if a news or program director believes a press release is worth a story, a reporter will make a phone call or visit an event, with the result that the reporting is original rather than a rewrite.
Businesses and organizations often use press releases...through mail though increasingly through the fax machine or PR Newswire...to tout promotions, reorganizations, mergers, hirings, layoffs and other activities. These press releases are the first, and sometimes the only official contact the business or organization will make with the media. Press releases are an essential aspect of business reporting. Let's say your fax machine spits out the following press release from an out-of-town bank announcing a deal for it to buy a local bank:
Heron Bank, Inc., of Lyons, has entered into a definitive agreement to acquire the Middleville Savings Bank, Inc., of Middleville, in a cash transaction for $8,375,000.
Mary Gonzales, President and Chief Executive Officer of Heron Bank, announced, "We are very pleased with opportunities afforded by our prospective acquisition of Middleville Savings Bank. We are looking forward to serving the Middleville community."
The closing of the acquisition transaction is subject to the completion by Heron Bank of its due diligence investigation of Middleville Savings Bank, as well as regulatory approval by federal and state banking officials.
Middleville Savings Bank has assets of $65,000,000 and operates three branches, two in Middleville and the third in Smalltown.
Heron Bank operates in seven markets in two states and has assets of $1,880,000,000. Heron Bank provides a full range of banking services to individuals and small-to-medium businesses.
This press release is full of legalese and large numbers. Bring the story close to home for your listeners by referring to something that will directly affect their lives, as in the lead to this 16-second reader:
YOU MAY SOON SEE A NEW SIGN OUTSIDE YOUR BANK. MIDDLEVILLE SAVINGS BANK IS ACCEPTING A BUYOUT OFFER FROM LYONS-BASED HERON BANK. THE EIGHT-POINT-FOUR MILLION DOLLAR DEAL WOULD ADD MIDDLEVILLE TO THE SEVEN OTHER CITIES SERVED BY HERON. THE DEAL STILL NEEDS THE OKAY FROM REGULATORS.
Remember that press releases are primary sources of information, like the tape from an interview. The information in a press release contains the bias of the organization that sent it out. Be aware of that bias and show the same prudence in dealing with press releases as you show with other forms of newsgathering.
Keep stories current
In the course of the day, stories you or other reporters have written need to be rewritten. Rewriting is essential not just because each time you tell a story it should sound different and fresh, but also because situations change. Keep the focus on what is current. An early-morning house fire will bring stories about the blaze, the firefighters and any injuries or fatalities. By midday, the lead concerns the amount of damage to the building. In the evening, the focus shifts to the family that might be homeless that night. The shifts in focus require rewriting the story several times in the course of the day.
Rewriting is an important aspect of radio journalism. Knowing how to adapt stories to your medium and to current situations will aid you in informing the public and gaining respect as a timely provider of news.
6. Using the numbers
One of the catch-phrases in teaching broadcast newswriting is that scripts should be "just like speaking" -- in other words, you should write the words and phrases you would use if you were talking to a friend. This is not quite correct, and it is especially not the case when it comes to numbers.
Not exactly like speaking
Take ages, for example. Ages in broadcast scripts are given as adjectival phrases placed in front of the person's name or other identifying feature, such as "67-year-old Dick Cheney," or "the 67-year-old Vice President." This type of construction is not, of course, conversational. The purpose for it is to make the use of numbers in scripts as clear as possible to our listeners.
This same desire for clarity should govern other appearances of numbers in our stories, such as in the following script on economic data:
THE NATION'S HOMEBUILDERS ARE KEEPING BUSY. THE GOVERNMENT REPORTS HOUSING STARTS CLIMBED ONE-POINT-FOUR PERCENT IN AUGUST AFTER A THREE-POINT-FIVE PERCENT RISE THE PREVIOUS MONTH. ECONOMISTS WELCOME THE NEWS, SAYING IT'S ANOTHER SIGN OF STEADY YET SUSTAINABLE GROWTH.
This story is economic -- so to speak -- in its use of numbers. Only two numbers are given, the percentages of increase for the months of July and August. Listeners aren't faced with statistical overload, and the script ends with expert explanation of these numbers' significance.
Two digits only
This story also follows the "two digits only" rule of newswriting: every number must be reduced to two significant digits. This involves rounding the numbers so that they don't end up taxing the short-term memories of listeners. For example, "six point eight three" becomes "six point eight," and "527" becomes "roughly 530." In addition, the descriptive words "half" and "quarter" are generally preferable to "point five" and "point two five."
Here's a story that fails to follow the "two digits" rule:
UNIONS REPRESENTING THE 1284 CLERICAL AND MAINTENANCE WORKERS AT MIDDLE STATE UNIVERSITY HAVE REJECTED PROPOSED CONTRACT CONCESSIONS. UNIVERSITY OFFICIALS WANTED THE UNIONS TO DELAY THEIR SCHEDULED THREE-POINT-SEVEN-FIVE-PERCENT PAY RAISE TO HELP THE SCHOOL DEAL WITH ITS ESTIMATED FOUR-POINT-SIX-ONE-MILLION-DOLLAR DEFICIT. ALTHOUGH LAYOFFS HAVE BEEN THREATENED IF THE CONCESSIONS WERE NOT APPROVED, WORKERS VOTED AGAINST THE PROPOSAL 1090 TO 89, WITH 105 FAILING TO VOTE.
This script is quite bad in its use of numbers, which are too large and appear too often. A better approach is to simplify and follow the "two digits rule":

UNIONS REPRESENTING NEARLY 13-HUNDRED CLERICAL AND MAINTENANCE WORKERS AT MIDDLE STATE UNIVERSITY HAVE REJECTED PROPOSED CONTRACT CONCESSIONS. UNIVERSITY OFFICIALS WANTED THE UNIONS TO DELAY A SCHEDULED PAY RAISE TO HELP THE SCHOOL DEAL WITH AN ESTIMATED FOUR-AND-A-HALF-MILLION-DOLLAR DEFICIT. ALTHOUGH LAYOFFS HAVE BEEN THREATENED IF THE CONCESSIONS WERE NOT APPROVED, WORKERS VOTED OVERWHELMINGLY AGAINST THE PROPOSAL.Keeping track of numbers is a difficult task even for the most attentive of listeners. If your station broadcasts lottery results, you may already have discovered that the newsroom telephone rings immediately after the numbers have been read on the air, and on the other end of the line is a listener who became confused or was unable to remember the lottery numbers by the time he or she found paper and pencil to write them down. Our purpose as journalists is to impart information in a helpful manner. Being judicious in the use of numbers should allow listeners a clearer understanding of the events affecting their lives.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

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